A SINGLE mother described the tragic moment she woke up to find her baby son dead next to her in bed.

In the middle of the night, Amanda Saucedo, who is from Lorain, Ohio, was awakened when one-month-old Ben started fussing. She changed Ben’s diaper and then brought him into bed with her to feed him.

The mother of two and former US Army veteran dozed out, but when she awoke at 8 am, she realized something was very wrong.

Ben was discovered dead in his own blood. On November 11, 2014, the crime was committed, and Amanda is still troubled by it.

Amanda, who also has a five-year-old son named Trae, was reported by The Scientific Parent as saying: “I turned to face my dear Ben, who was curled up next to me as usual.

However, there was a problem. He had a pallid complexion, and one of his nostrils was partially blocked. When I stood up, I saw a pool of blood next to Ben.

I said quietly to myself, “No.” This is not taking place!

My 30-day-old kid was lying on his back when I took him up, placed him down, and began to shake him gently while yelling, “Ben! Get up! Ben, get up.

“I realized he wouldn’t wake up at that moment. He’d already departed.

“I paced my living room while speaking to the (911) operator then carried Ben downstairs.

She repeatedly questioned me about commencing CPR. I repeatedly reassured her that there was no justification. Ben had left.

He wasn’t like my Ben anymore, and his frail body was hard in my arms. I was conscious of the lack of hope. He disappeared for a while.

The case was sent to an inquest after Amanda was questioned by the police about her drug and alcohol use.

“Was Ben hurt when he passed away?” asked Amanda. I simply asked the coroner one question.

He claimed that infants this small typically don’t experience pain when they suffocate.

“At that point, shame seized total control of my life and spirit. Did I murder Ben?

I was aware, though, that I didn’t turn over or lie down next to him. According to the coroner, smothering is another name for suffocation.

Ben suffocated when I went to sleep for some reason. I assured Ben that nothing was obstructing his airway. If his nose and mouth weren’t covered, how did this happen? I couldn’t understand it.

“Despite the detective’s kindness, I had the impression that I was the target of their search, as if I had done something to induce my long period of slumber. However, nothing was there.

“Today, I’m going to hell. The story that shouldn’t be told is that one. Furthermore, it doesn’t appear to become much simpler.

Despite the lack of supporting evidence, Ben’s cause of death was given as positional “asphyxiation due to dangerous sleep settings”.

Regarding her decision, Amanda explains, “I was enraged and obsessed by guilt.”

Naturally, when situations like this do occur, other people always want to draw their own judgments and conjectures about what must have gone wrong.

“Accidents in bed only happen to those who are intoxicated, high, or obese, right?

“There is no question that this caregiver or parent did not adhere to the safe sleep recommendations provided by the top attachment parenting experts.

“The rest of the world is constantly looking for an error, any excuse they can use to cling to their delusion that they would never experience this.

Surely no healthy youngster ever passes away? They do, sadly. My own did.

In an effort to spread awareness about SUDI, SIDS, and the possible dangers of sharing a bed with a small child, Amanda is now speaking out.

She claimed that losing a child is painful and difficult. It makes me angry and sad.

“The emotions that loss brings up all conflict at once. I would do anything to keep others from going through this pain.

You lose yourself as well as your child when this happens. The loss of your child will always signal the start of your life’s second phase. You change over time.

“Since Ben left, I believe it is my responsibility to educate parents about sound sleeping practices. Information isn’t always taken seriously.

“Information on safe bed-sharing can be found in abundance online. I’ve lost Ben, so I can’t really agree with it.

A newborn who shares a bed is at risk of SIDS or SUID, according to numerous studies.

“Many individuals tell me that they would rather have their child by their side than be by themselves if their infant were to pass away suddenly while they were sleeping. I’d have to disagree there as well.

“I’ll carry the fact that I’ll never be able to determine whether my child would still be alive today if he had been let to sleep alone with me to my grave.

“I believe that if Ben had passed away while I was following the ABCs of safe sleep, I wouldn’t have to deal with this ongoing shame and doubt.

“Could his passing be averted? I might never learn. But I would never want anyone to feel this sense of foolishness or embarrassment.

Amanda spreads awareness by gifting Benny Bears and a short essay that her child authored to new parents.